notes

Communication

• Communication
  • Knowing what to say
  • Communication with Emotional Intelligence
  • Influencing Others
    • Build Rapport
    • Be Likable
    • Being Influenceable

Knowing what to say

1. Identify your desired outcomes.
   • Do you want to persuade people?
   • Are you introducing a new idea?
   • What do you need to consider the presentation a success?
2. Determine the words to illustrate how do you wanna come across?
   • Confident?
   • Inspiring?

Communication with Emotional Intelligence

1. Avoid why questions or leading questions
   • Why would you suggest that? Thanks for sharing your idea!
   • So, you’re fine with our sales plummeting? Can you share more about the possible effect on sales?
2. Never trivialize
   • That happens to everyone. I’m sure that was frustrating.
3. Avoid absolute, definite statements
   • No, it’s like this. Here is another way to look at it.
4. Avoid blame and assume positive intent.
5. Start sentences with I or We instead of You.
   • You were late. I needed this report yesterday.
   • You’re wrong. I see things differently.
   • You aren’t realistic. We need to stay in budget.

Influencing Others

Build Rapport

1. Listen.
2. Get to know your counterpart. I also makes sense to get to know about their personal life.
3. Find out their goals.
   • What would be the best use of your time in our conversation today?
   • If this meeting went well, what would be the best outcome for you?
4. State your positive intent early.
   • We have some challenging issues to discuss today, and I want to be clear about the positive purpose I have in mind.
5. Give explicit credit to them for positive intent.
   • I think I’m understanding the positive intent you have in bringing this up. [Ask clarification questions]. Is that right?

Be Likable

Some people cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

Don’t fake it. Find the right version for yourself.

1. Have the right mindset.
   • before the meeting
     • I’m happy to be here
     • I’m happy to see you
     • behave that way
   • demonstrate your positive attitude
     • smile more than frow
     • encourage more than critisize
2. Seek and highlight similarities.
3. Give credit to relevant qualities.
   • I’ve heard that you are open-minded person who weighs all the facts

Being Influenceable

Being humble is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of youself less.

1. Don’t win arguments.
   • win hearts in minds
2. Acknowledge others’ positive effect on you / project.
   • Thank you, I hadn’t looked on it before
   • I appreciate you challenging me on it
3. Share your improvement efforts.